Letter from an "Engineer" to God

The Almighty,

Saviour of Engineers,

Residing in Heaven.

Subject:- Requesting your blessings and a little help in exams

My Lord,

        It's Christmas and New Year time again. An occasion of celebration and enjoyment. A time when your children should be out on the streets rejoicing. But the Satan has devised a plan to spoil the festive mood. He has taken the form of our "respected" principal and has scheduled exams during this time.

        Satan has made sure that once again I have failed to prepare for the exam.He has used lucrative means like Booze, Cards, Movies, Parties, etc to deviate me from my studies (just as he has been doing for the last 3 years). This time he added another weapon to his inventory. FACEBOOK! How the hell.... sorry. How on earth am I supposed to study with so many distractions.

        My Lord, I request you.. nah I beg you to bless me with knowledge (without studying). Please please please pass me in this last year of my engineering career. I won't trouble you with anymore exam-time requests after this. Please have mercy on your child!!

Thanking you.

Yours' lovingly (& devoted)

.............

(7th semester Mechanical)

P.S :- I forgot to mention my roll no. It is 1SI07ME...

              

"Expression of Love"

I hold you in the silent space of my heart. I hope you know it. Sometimes I can't see inside my heart, sometimes I can. Sometimes I know what it Wants, sometimes I don't. But my words always show the inside - over and over again. The silent grieving, the silent loving, the pain inside, it all comes out in the form of words. The words of sadness, words of anger and rage, then tenderness, sorrow, elation, exuberance, frustration, moments of inner peace, they all reveal something. My words are looking for a match. They are waiting for you to break through the walls of my heart and to see the respect, trust and affection I have for you.

There have been times that I have expressed my love and have been hurt. I have never regretted showing love. However an optimistic part of my heart yearns that a part of it is reciprocated by my beloved.Love has the power to heal, and, transform. Every expression of love carries in it the seeds of possibilities. Love has to be nurtured and honored. It has the ability to lift us up and give us hope, tenderness and affection. My love for you drives me. It is the motivating force which has given a new direction to my life.

I think of you each morning when I rise,
I think of you When I close my eyes.

You are the reason behind my smile,

Your love make my life worth-while.

I don't know what the future of these feelings are. I don't know where these feelings will lead me. But I do know this that for now these feelings guide my life.

The Cost of "LOVING"....

My Heart says:- "LOVE is my light; sun of all my mornings, fire of all my nights.."

My Mind says:- " Love is just another 4-lettered word.."

My Mind says:- Loving someone makes me vulnerable to pain and suffering. It disturbs the calm and peace of my otherwise peaceful life. Love makes me dependent. Love makes me lose my sleep. Love gives me a million reasons to get depressed. Love complicates everything.

My Heart argues:- Falling in love is a different feeling altogether. Love is the beauty of the soul. It takes off the mask that I fear I cannot live without and know I cannot live within. It brings out all the good in me.

Broken dreams,pain, hurt,heartaches, tears, guilt, jealousy, mood swings, etc are the consequences of love. Loss of sleep, lack of smile, absence of goals characterize love.

Is it worthwhile?

Yes it is! Loving someone gives me strength and courage. It gives me a reason to live.To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life are already dead. To love abundantly is to live abundantly, and to love forever is to live forever.

Love is the truth I seek and hence I choose to love despite the Cost of "LOVING"..

Reason to Live

When I am  sad you are there to wipe my tears.

When I am afraid you are there to allay my fears.

You are an angel that takes away my pain,

I await you like a desert waits for rain.

I've always believed angels to be invulnerable,

Immortals with reasons for happiness innumerable.

Now that I know you, I know its not true,

Because angels can be unhappy; angels can bleed too.

I know I can come to you when I am down,

You'll be there to help me without a frown.

You'll always be there, to listen and understand me.

I care for you as much as you care for me.

I think of you each morning when I rise,

I think of you when I close my eyes,

Your thoughts occupy my mind whole day long,

With each passing moment my feelings grow strong.

For you see, each day I love you so much more,

Today more than yesterday and tomorrow even more.

What I need to live the earth can give me,

But the reason to live only you can give me.

Joke of the Millennium..

My memory doesn't serve me well when it comes to my childhood, but I do remember some shady details. I remember reading "The adventures of Tom Sawyer". In a particular chapter Tom feigns a toothache in order to avoid school on Monday morning. I share Tom's view that "Monday should never come after Sunday". I have never feigned a toothache; I relied more on fever and stomachache. I hated going to school back then and my views still haven't changed. I absolutely detest the words "teaching" and "teachers"( with very few exceptions). My handwriting is "chicken-like" as one my my teachers at school remarked once. I am lethargic on the best of my days and I have a revulsion for anything that requires some effort.A trouble-maker at school and at home, I've always had a disregard for rules. Who could have predicted that one day I'll be an engineer.

At this juncture of my life, I am seven months away from my engineering degree. Looking back at the last four years I can say that being an engineer is no big deal.I attend very few classes. I am rarely in time for those few classes. When in class I utilize my time drawing sketches on the last page, and updating my Facebook status. I seldom prepare for exams. If at all I study something it is on the last night before the exam. Each exam is a new experience. Copying from others is a must. It isn't just me, everyone else is just the same.

It's exam time again. The end of 7th semester. Placements, exams, projects.... there are so many things that should occupy my mind. But instead I sit idly in front of my laptop writing something and thinking only about one question. What is the "joke of the millennium"? The fact that I am going to be an engineer in seven months time or the fact that I am still not sure that I want to be one.

Deliverance

I never knew a part in me,

That could get depressed.

Every disappointment and pain

Could be suppressed.

Alas! Little did I know,

That what I believed was not true!

'Coz with each passing day,

You unfold the mystery in you.

Now I really know,

That I made  a wrong assumption

That you have to travel a mile,

to reach your destination.

I miss the sparkle in my eyes,

that stirred the emotions in others,

Gloom seems to be pointing at me...

Breaking my spine and sending shivers.

At this crossroad I guess,

I'm still sitting on the fence,

Hoping to achieve something,

Waiting for my Deliverance...